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Wednesday, November 23, 2011

The emotional piece take II.....

Our eczema/allergy battle takes many twists and turns on a daily basis. We have tried literally EVERYTHING, or at least a little of everything. Most recently, in addition to different water, we have been targeting the emotional piece. We have always seen a correlation of J's hives/itch with her emotional state. After reading an article that I linked into The emotional piece post last month, I realized that my personality/relationship with J could be an aspect to her condition. So following much reflection after reading that article I have made a few changes. This is definitely a work in progress and I have many slip ups, but I feel like we took a step in the right direction on many levels. Before reading this article I would find myself losing my patience at the drop of a hat. I am a very uptight person to begin with, I have a very hard time multi-tasking and get flustered very quickly. I am also a very empathetic person. I have a very hard time seeing people going through struggles. This is amplified by the fact that J is my daughter and seeing her suffer in anyway puts me on constant edge. I find that a ticking bomb explodes inside of me when she scratches. I am OCD about my daily routine and what I "have" to get done and when. I was in the habit of doing too much "busy work" and not enough playing with my kids. I have since tried, and I say try because old habits are hard to break, to not do busy work until after the girls go to bed. I have tried to just let loose and just be ridiculous with the girls. I am trying to put my phone down while they are awake and around. I am smiling more and stressing less. I can not put all of this effort into her skin and allergies and not into her spirit. I am LOVING it. Today I laid on the floor while my two girls tickled me until I was blue. At one point M got upset because she thought I was hurt. I LOVE it!!! J and I sat down and made three house rules, of which I had written in my head and steered her too. They were things that she struggles with because I have let her get away with too much due to certain aspects of our situation. She is loving it and has listened to me all day today, the first time I said something. Tonight she straightened the entire living room before she laid down. I am so ashamed at the point I got to where I was so driven by the business and lost site of the smiles! But hey, hind sight is 20/20 and all I can do is learn from my mistakes. But I did want to say that I have noticed a HUGE difference in both her behavior and her irritability. I hope that this lesson that I learned, may help someone else. I know how overwhelming and stressed out it can be to have a child that has daily struggles that can make them miserable and I know how much pressure that can be for a parent. It is easy to lose sight of what matters while doing the things you have to do to keep them comfortable. I am just happy I realized before it was too late. They are still young and I am determined to raise children who are atopic AND fabulous....Heck, they are already there ;)

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